What God wants
My friend Anna said something that really resonated with me today as we were emailing back and forth about something that has been weighing heavily on my mind. I'm in a transition period right now with a fair amount of uncertainty, and she put things in perspective when she said, "Truth is, if God wants you there ... you will be there. Do you ever think of it like that? Deep down, you really want what God wants, anyway."
She's absolutely right. If God desires for me to have this opportunity or that, there is no way to stop that from happening. If it doesn't happen, there is no reason in the world why I should want it to.
I always try to approach life with a general openness to what God wants, but I manage to lose that focus at times and I need someone to articulate it...oh, say about once a week. I do want what God wants. I think we all do because we know that's what will ultimately be best for us, because it will produce the most spiritually profound results. Perhaps that is what's so scarey. The most spiritually profound results don't always match our own personal goals and dreams. But they always lead to the place where we will be the most emotionally whole and the most spiritually sanctified. All it takes is a willingness to fall and a trust that we won't.
Last week my friend Sara reminded me of something I had said in a book that I wrote two years ago. I said, "After all, what I think is best for me and what God knows is best for me are often two different things. I’ll go with God every time. God had gone to great lengths to put me where I would grow and learn the most..." God will continue to do that for anyone who trusts that there is a greater purpose.
It dumbfounding to me to think that some conservative Christians still think that our very existence is an affront to God, who somehow abhors homosexuality and despises the things that we have allowed to manifest in our lives. I'm just one example, but as I have matured and pursued wisdom in God with greater intensity, my homosexual awakening has been just one natural by-product, and I know that God not only embraces me as a lesbian but desires for me to be the best darn lesbian I can possibly be. Each day I need to be a better spouse than I was the day before, a better Christian than I was the day before, etc. God leads us to the space where we will grow and learn the most both emotionally and spiritually, and this is the path that is right for me. "If God wants us there, we will be there."
The Bible is half of the Christian picture. The other half is the experience between God and the individual. When we take experience into account, it becomes increasingly obvious that God is not opposed to homosexuality. God has been working hard to refine me and others like me, and this refining process has stopped short of ridding us of homosexuality. The Holy Spirit has the power to convict us of sin, and homosexuality is not an issue. I've been convicted about things like selfishness, greed, and bad driving habits, but never about homosexuality. And I have flat out asked for it. Frankly, I think God has more important things to worry about than whether or not I fall asleep next to a man or a woman. God refines me so that I will be more selfless, more generous, and more courteous on the Tollway, because these are conditions of the heart and things that define who I am as a person and as a Christian. To practice excellence in those areas and others is what God wants for me and others who are determined to live faith-filled lives.
If God wants us somewhere, we will be there. Doors to opportunity will open and we will be invited to seize them. If the doors don't open, there is some greater purpose at hand that will reveal itself in time, and we will be better off having surrendered to it. God is good and God wants the same for all of us. It's just nice to be reminded that the path to that goodness (or spiritual wholeness) is different for all of us, and that God knows best.
She's absolutely right. If God desires for me to have this opportunity or that, there is no way to stop that from happening. If it doesn't happen, there is no reason in the world why I should want it to.
I always try to approach life with a general openness to what God wants, but I manage to lose that focus at times and I need someone to articulate it...oh, say about once a week. I do want what God wants. I think we all do because we know that's what will ultimately be best for us, because it will produce the most spiritually profound results. Perhaps that is what's so scarey. The most spiritually profound results don't always match our own personal goals and dreams. But they always lead to the place where we will be the most emotionally whole and the most spiritually sanctified. All it takes is a willingness to fall and a trust that we won't.
Last week my friend Sara reminded me of something I had said in a book that I wrote two years ago. I said, "After all, what I think is best for me and what God knows is best for me are often two different things. I’ll go with God every time. God had gone to great lengths to put me where I would grow and learn the most..." God will continue to do that for anyone who trusts that there is a greater purpose.
It dumbfounding to me to think that some conservative Christians still think that our very existence is an affront to God, who somehow abhors homosexuality and despises the things that we have allowed to manifest in our lives. I'm just one example, but as I have matured and pursued wisdom in God with greater intensity, my homosexual awakening has been just one natural by-product, and I know that God not only embraces me as a lesbian but desires for me to be the best darn lesbian I can possibly be. Each day I need to be a better spouse than I was the day before, a better Christian than I was the day before, etc. God leads us to the space where we will grow and learn the most both emotionally and spiritually, and this is the path that is right for me. "If God wants us there, we will be there."
The Bible is half of the Christian picture. The other half is the experience between God and the individual. When we take experience into account, it becomes increasingly obvious that God is not opposed to homosexuality. God has been working hard to refine me and others like me, and this refining process has stopped short of ridding us of homosexuality. The Holy Spirit has the power to convict us of sin, and homosexuality is not an issue. I've been convicted about things like selfishness, greed, and bad driving habits, but never about homosexuality. And I have flat out asked for it. Frankly, I think God has more important things to worry about than whether or not I fall asleep next to a man or a woman. God refines me so that I will be more selfless, more generous, and more courteous on the Tollway, because these are conditions of the heart and things that define who I am as a person and as a Christian. To practice excellence in those areas and others is what God wants for me and others who are determined to live faith-filled lives.
If God wants us somewhere, we will be there. Doors to opportunity will open and we will be invited to seize them. If the doors don't open, there is some greater purpose at hand that will reveal itself in time, and we will be better off having surrendered to it. God is good and God wants the same for all of us. It's just nice to be reminded that the path to that goodness (or spiritual wholeness) is different for all of us, and that God knows best.
posted by Jen Austin at 3:29 PM
1 Comments:
"All it takes is a willingness to fall and a trust that we won't."
I love that... thank you for sharing, Jen.
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